what are you living for?

self-explanatory

all the clichés were true. having a dream does give you a certain - power. having a purpose in life does make your life that much more worth living.

i will admit that i had no concrete goals in life prior to this. all i was doing was drifting from short-term goal to short-term goal. and all my short-term goals were jokes themselves. get a film camera. get film. bring camera around. photoshop these 50 pics today.

having an ultimate dream gives you that push, that urgency and that fire that will nudge you towards what you want. you work hard and you strive - because you want to. no, because you need to.

what makes this different from all the times i've claimed to be 'inspired'? in the past, i was inspired to be a good doctor. i have realised that that is a very... vague goal and it wasn't enough for me to actually have anything to work with.

now, i have kinda resolved ('kinda' because i am shit scared about what is going to happen should i really decide to take this one step further, and i am also scared that i will fail) on something more specific and i find that that has made all the difference.

i would blog more (i don't know why i always end up being so long-winded on this blog -_-) but i am currently horribly worried about my luggage being overweight and not having enough space for things in my backpack. dammit why'd i have to get so much stuff?! (in all fairness, i barely shopped)

ok ttyl. i will be back. :)